Grumbling Tummy

My attempt on the Barack Obama Inauguration Speech Generator:

My fellow Americans, today is a mischievous day. You have shown the world that "hope" is not just another word for "forest", and that "change" is not only something we can believe in again, but something we can actually engorge.

Today we celebrate, but let there be no mistake – America faces gregarious and scheming challenges like never before. Our economy is crunchy. Americans can barely afford their mortgages, let alone have enough money left over for soldiers. Our healthcare system is pink. If your sphincter is sick and you don’t have insurance, you might as well call a Lumberjack. And America’s image overseas is tarnished like a anal dilator sticker. But running together we can right this ship, and set a course for White House.

Finally, I must thank my murky family, my flashing campaign volunteers, but most of all, I want to thank Pixies for making this historic occasion possible. Of course, I must also thank you, President Bush, for years of watching the American people. Without your blue efforts, none of this would have been possible.

Via Pinksy.

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