Grumbling Tummy

This is the funniest thing I’ve seen in ages! Video embedded below.

Did I mention it probably isn’t safe for work! Yes, it really is that good.

Technorati Tags: funny, humor, humour, The Website is Down

One of the Groktalks at DDD5 was given by a young team from a local university and was all about their project to make the introduction of programming to youngsters more interesting. According to Hamish, their project is aimed at the 7- 11 age group. I’ll defer to his knowledge on the subject, as all I can remember from the guys was “key stage” this and “key stage” that – WTF is a “key stage”?  

They asked for any comments and tips and I’m pleased to give this one…

DO NOT PICK YOUR NOSE, EVEN IF SOMEONE ELSE IS PRESENTING

Good luck to the guys for the international leg of the competition, which I believe is the Imagine Cup (again, info from Hamish’s blog).

Technorati Tags: DDD5, DeveloperDeveloperDeveloper, Groktalk, Imagine Cup, My First Programming Language, nose picking, presenting, presentation tip

Just noticed that Craig Murphy has a new signature! Not sure when it changed but it now contains:

Microsoft MVP (Connected Systems)

It has left me wondering what this connected systems malarky is all about? My best guess would be something like the photo below.

Looks about right to me!

I’m also presuming Craig’s new developer kit includes all the stuff listed HERE.

I’ve been in the trenches for a while but the inappropriate or misfunctional event and conference collateral has finally scarred me for life!

Okay, I was a bit late on getting over to the collateral table at the Microsoft MSDN Roadshow, but it had to be pointed out to me with it being tucked well in the back of the refreshment area. The groovy WinFX polo shirt certainly looked just the ticket, so I made my way over towards the table. Thank you god, there were shirts still available.

However, my trauma began when I discovered the packaging had already been opened, and the scarring went even deeper when I observed the event girl had given me an XXL size. Now I’d always consider myself more of a S or M type of guy (maybe even a little S & M, but that is a story for another time), so the voices in my head have been calling me a “fat bast^&d” all morning! The taunting is getting even more intense and they just started with,

“Who ate all the pies, who ate all the pies, you fat bas%^&, you fat bas%^&…. you ate all the pies!”

Even worse I believe they have a Seattle, USA accent this time.

Will these voices never end!

It has been a long time since I last attended an eXtreme Wednesday session: most probably over a year. In that time it seems I’ve forgotten everything I once learned on using Eclipse and Junit – well maybe not everything but it is close. What a crying shame as the guys over there really did teach me a thing or two!

At least I’ve managed to download the latest release candidate and get it installed with Java 1.5.0 running away. Now I can see a lot of Googling and eXtreme Wednesday mailing list messages being posted over the coming weeks.

I will be blogging on my experiences of relearning Eclipse and Java over the coming weeks both here and the more professional viewpoint over on the Roundtrip Solutions Blog.

Have a look at the following amusing article if you’re a software developer:

How To Write Unmaintainable Code

Just tried a Nerd Test. Have a go yourself!

In the FDD Book Signed posting I indicated that FDD tool support was sadly lacking. Well it is less than a week and it would appear that a tool has been built to meet my gripe:

FDD Manager

Went along to the Feature Driven Development talk being run by Agile Scotland. An excellent session, by one of the FDD leaders David J Anderson, who talked for nearly two hours about his experience of building software and how FDD helps. He went on for a further thirty minutes answering questions, one of which was from me on tool support, before we all retired to the pub.

On the subject of tool support, it looks like this is a weakness at the moment. There may be tools to assist in the process later this year.

… and I got my book signed. Although I was disappointed that it didn’t say something like:

“To my dearest friend John….”

Did manage to convince David to place the presentation onto his blog soon.

Was awakened this morning by the ordered copy of Agile Management for Software Engineering by David J. Anderson dropping through the letterbox. It was ordered so I’d be ready for next week’s Agile Scotland event.

Thanks go to the excellent service of Computer Manuals.

By this time next week I should have an autographed copy and have met the man himself .

Hubert Smits has announced another well known speaker from the international agile world is coming to Scotland. David Anderson will be visiting us at 7pm on July 19th to talk about Feature Driven Design. Many thanks go to Clarke Ching, who managed to persuade him to come and speak for the Agile Scotland group.

The meeting is in the usual venue: the offices of Currie & Brown (ground floor), the address of which is:
1 Osborne Terrace
Edinburgh
EH12 5HG

Route description: 2 minutes “out of town” from Haymarket Station, turn left, the office is app. 200 yards down the road just before Donaldson’s School/College.

Subject: Feature Driven Development (FDD).

Speaker: David Anderson

Author of “Agile Management for Software Engineering – Applying the Theory of Constraints for Business Results” will be discussing Feature Driven Development and where it fits in the agile world.

Biography -
David Anderson’s Online Bio

David has 22 years experience in the software development business. Until April 2004, he held the position of Director of Emerging Technology at 4thpass Inc – a Motorola subsidiary in Seattle, WA. David was a member of the team which created the agile software development method known as Feature Driven Development in Singapore between 1997 and 1999. David introduced FDD at Sprintpcs.com, the Internet business unit of Sprint PCS in Kansas City, MO, where he reported to John Yuzdepski, VP & GM. He was one of a core team of 8 senior managers and junior execs who created the technical product offer for the launch of PCS Vision. He also launched the Sprint Application Developer program for wireless data applications in October 2001. David had brief spells working as a consultant for Nokia USA in Irving TX, and Eircell in Dublin Ireland.

Earlier in his career he held managerial positions in two startups in the UK – Rombo, a video imaging company – and MDi Systems, a document imaging company. Prior to starting college, David was a leading computer games developer with Ocean Software in the UK with over 20 titles published including the game of the Sylvester Stallone movie “Rambo”.

David holds a degree in Electronics and Computer Science from the University of Strathclyde, Glasgow, UK. His first book, “Agile Management for Software Engineering” was published in September 2003 by Prentice Hall Professional Technical Reference, Upper Saddle River, New York.

This alternative take on the Sun Microsystems and Microsoft deal is very funny indeed.

Checkout the other Flash movies in the series:

Inside Jack – Solaris 10

Inside Jack – AMD

Craig Murphy has written an excellent synopsis of the Scottish Developers Day Conference in Perth on Friday past. It can be found HERE.

Scottish Developers’ events are superb. They are a must attend for developers.

During the two day Microsoft MSDN Roadshow last week, the core team from Scottish Developers were taken to dinner by Microsoft. A good time was had by all at a Nepalese restaurant in Edinburgh.

There is a well know saying, “There’s no such thing as a free lunch!” But on this occasion I have to disagree. If anything we were the ones taking advantage of Mr Gates’ company. Perhaps this will now mean the cost of Windows going up!

Travelled down to Name Droppers in Cowdenbeath today to pickup the new Scottish Developers T-shirts. The core team will be wearing them at next weeks Microsoft MSDN/Technet Roadshow. So here it is, the world premier preview of the latest cat walk fashion… [drum roll please]

It has occurred to me that so far I’ve managed to avoid any photos of myself on the blog. Ah well! I had to scare the kids at some point .